Re-Think the Use of this Blog #ScienceDiary02

Just a while ago I re-read my first diary about science, huhu~that does sounds imaginative. God, what was I thinking trying to convince anyone using this blog... I just wanna say, these past few months, it's been traumatic for my soul to goes any further. I got mini-pre-stroke in my body, yesterday I though I found the source of this aching around my left thigh but turns out... it wasn't, it still in pain however how hard I try to put heat patch on it. 

I'm so tired, I know I don't deserve any wealth of this world, because of my personality, but being unable to contribute anything too, makes me think, what is it that I could do for this sick world ? I even tried to call some contacts of social science community, but they won't believe me. There's so many cornered situation I got and never gave me any chance to proof by practical, so... 

I'm so done of this, right now I only have a few cash left. True my dad always supported me financially but passion is what I needed, now no passion no source to support my passion makes me think what do I have to lose anymore ? I've been "seeing" a lot of things that's gonna happen, but at some point, who's gonna believe a word from stranger who's not even famous to begin with, silly me. I watched a lot, I saw a lot, I observed a lot, but nobody ever give a damn about what I saying.

Don't know until when I keep blogging and studying through Alison and Duolingo but, if there's a week I'm not around, it means I have gone for the sake of this world.